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Friday, November 05, 2004
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Weeks flew as the time fleets... Day by day i age, yet i found myself lost acquiantanceship with lady wisdom whom i once met and treasured... The temptations of this carnal, philisitine world are strong... time and time again, i found myself lost in a world of lust, of carnality... Surrounding me are word pertaining to sex, to lust... Thought that i should be strong enough to resist all, but i was wrong... I've fallen into this deep trap which the devil had set... i too have fallen into the conversation... however, the time of awakening has come.... i chose to be awakened... however, it would also mark that, my relationship with some will start to draw apart... But to compromise my faith to suit the world, why should i??? Yet i do not want to make it offensive... i do not want to make it as though i am despising them... To detach from all those secular talks are easy, the obstacle come when i want to still keep in good relationship with them... Sex has been their main supper... and it has became their culture... But its not mine, and never will i let it be...
Anyway... well life has been as usual, note has.... not much have changed... my days seems to overlap each other... but i am such glad Project Work is over... it had been a nemesis, a torment for months now... Well, sometimes my classmate joke bout me being an ailen, coz the things i do often are different from them... they felt that i am just so different... i know they are joking, but sometimes i felt they are so true... Statistically, oh i have many friends... but they are more of horizontal friends, not so much of vertical friends... what i mean??? horizontal ( --- ) , Vertical ( l ) ... see the different, horizontal is across however, vertical is deep down... likewise, i have many friends, but most are ---, these friendship are not deep... sad truth is, actually i have no vertical friend or rather yes, theres one, but in the divine realm not on earth...actually even for that divine one, He knows everything bout me... have deep relationship with me, but i seem to know nothing bout Him...
Pondering over many things... Hmmm seriously, i am really a perfectionist... a quite severe case... i come to realise that especially during PW... i have very high expectation in all things... and found myself, working endlessly to meet the high expectations, but its comforting to know that i end up reaching my very high expectation... out of all my weakness i think one of greatest would be my ambitious character... i am very ambitious... i saw one of my friends progress report... WOW practially all are in the 90% and above percentile, me, gosh... 41 for math, 80 for bio, 86 for chem, 68 for GP, 26 for chinese... i am very sadden by GP, 68%... another words i am in the top 32%... that is horrible... for chinese... MMMmmm many are starting to call me the banana, i am a chinese, but i am like what... the top 74% for chinese... thats = among the last of the cohort... wow... btw i like the word ANGLOPHILE more than BANANA... sound so much more refined... with this ambitious heart i just say one thing... i will reach what he achieved.. in fact i will do better than what he had done... i dont believe i cant reach it... even right now, to say study, i think i end up doing my own things more than studying and i can clear my whole promo... i believe 90% in my 3 A level shouldnt be a big problem...
However, i must say, though i dont have vertical friends but i do have some are slightly more slanted than horizontal... my dear bro and sis.... Great to have know them... at times true even among them, i seem to blend into the background but then i guess being in their presence is really a very nice thing, a great blessing...
Prince A.W.Potter
Remembering On|11/05/2004 08:15:00 PM|
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